my first sick day!

well, the inevitable had to happen. yesterday around 4 a.m. i woke up to a terrible stomach-ache. long story short, i spent the next day, half in bed--half in the bathroom. with a full stomach of bananas and salty crackers, however, i took to the road this morning and made it 40 or so miles from diancheng (where i was sick) to the city of wuchuan.

one of the feelings i've been experiencing has a lot to do with the humanity of the people here. growing up, i always knew china as this large geographical space in asia. i didn't know much about the people and i certainly did not know anyone who identified as chinese. so what i knew about china came largely from the mass media and other sorts of mainstream information outlets that commonly portray other non-white cultures as inferior.

having internalized some of this racism, i feel that socialization breaking down during my time here. that process happens simply by seeing chinese people in their day to day lives. to see them smiling. to see them at work. to see them with family. oftentimes it's the most subtle or mundane acts or sights that really get me. such as walking into a bookstore and seeing a group of people hanging around the magazine rack just like in the states. or pedaling past a farm and seeing scarecrows in the fields. or having someone offer me a toothpick after i eat a meal. more than anything else, i have been overwhelmed by people's overwhelming kindness. whenever i need to find something or need help doing something, people are mostly willing to lend a hand. if only i could speak chinese!

feeling worn and lonely.
charlie